brothers

Yesterday, Elijah and Isaiah were playing army men in the living room. Army men has been a frequent game lately with Jason in Iraq. They had pieced together juice box boxes and 12pk sodas and strung them across the kitchen and living room with chairs and what not and had created a bridge. Elijah got tired of the game and moved on to bigger and better things, but Isaiah wasn't quite ready. So, Isaiah came back to the room and told on Elijah because Elijah wouldn't play bridge with him. And when I said that it was o.k., Elijah didn't have to play every game that he played, Isaiah responded with, "but, he's my best friend."

Now, there are a couple of little miracles here. One is that my child who was mostly unintelligble some 7 months ago is now talking so well, and coming up with new and wonderful phrases that I know that I didn't teach him (unless he's already able to read and has logged on to my blog and read all my best friend blog issues - at which point, I've created a genius). The other little miracle is that at the tender ages of 7 and 3, Elijah and Isaiah's relationship is already beginning to move beyond siblings to friends, and there's something precious there. Now, at first, I thought I'd just enjoy the moment and I'd remember it. But I know that I would forget - mom's always forget. So, of course I got the camera out and had him repeat it. And while I was there, thought about my brother and had them record a message for him - but of course, though they might work together - they conspire against me - and it was more of a silly time than anything real. That doesn't mean that I didn't put it in a video... cuz I did. It does mean that when I did add a few pictures of my brother at the end as tribute.

Brother's do hold a special sort of place in the world. I look at my dad and Uncle Darrell who stayed in the same town and live next door to each other, and visit with each other almost every day. And I envy that. And I think that those types of relationships are easier for boys growing up than they are for girls. Not that I can say for sure - but it seems to me that girls bond more as adolescents when they go through growing up trauma - and my sister and I didn't have the same interests during that time . . . so some of that was missed - we had to wait until we were both parents - and even then she was 12 years into it when I first started, and a grandmother not long after I had my last. But Jason, well, I suppose it's best summed up with this quote that I found:

There is a little boy inside the man who is my brother. Oh, how I hated that little boy. And how I love him too.-- Anna Quindlan

I think that hate is too strong a word - but oh man that annoying little fart who used to stick his finger right up to my face on car rides - he's still in there. And when he comes to pick on my kids and they look at me in desperation, (and when he did it to Lanny), Jodi and I sit back and watch with a bit of a rite of passage mentality --- It is Jason, and this must be survived -- but know that he does it with love.