The Myth of Exercise
Alright – I have been at this walking thing for almost 3 weeks now – or it could be 4 weeks – hard really for me to tell, the days are all blurring together in my old age. And I have stumbled upon the myth of exercise. You know how when your flipping through the channels and you see some exercise guru telling you how much better you feel when you exercise. And how you’ll have more energy and everything just feels better, tastes better, is better when you exercise regularly.
Well – they are lying. Or actually, to be fair, they are using the money they earn while filming the info-mercial to buy drugs so they feel peppy – because I can say that after 3 or 4 weeks of walking at least 1 ½ miles (and sometimes 2 or 2 ½ miles) a day – I still feel like crap. Worse than that, when I get home, I’m so sore – in my body protest for actually performing a physical task – that I don’t want to move at all. On top of that – I’m usually starving – and eat bad foods right after. And as I don’t have a scale and am waiting for the final call when I go to see Dr. Cofoid (my endrocinologist) I am doubtful if there is any weight loss as well – though I can tell you when I’m sitting almost immobile in the chair, I do think my calves have shaped up – and are looking quite nice – but that’s probably exhaustion induced hallucinations.
So, I know that man you have had bouts of exercise – and if you feel better when you exercise – and it’s not a mental sense of accomplishment that you were able to withstand the torture and are now prepared to be captured by an enemy army because there’s really nothing that they can do to you that you can’t withstand as long as you’re laying down – well then I don’t want to hear it – I think it must mean that you are way tooo skinny and don’t need to be walking anyway.
And for the rest of you – any of you in Bowling Green, are more than welcome to join me as I huff, puff, and complain about the lack of a perfectly flat walking surface at Freeman Park or Richpond Elementary – usually about 3:00 – they both have fenced parks in constant view – and we’re always happy to have a playdate.
